Happy Birthday, John

Always my favorite Beatle. They were all very witty, but there was a darker edge to John, and that spoke to me.

I remember a Tuesday morning in December, 1980. I woke and sat down to breakfast. My father said, "One of your heroes died last night." He didn't say it with any malice, but not with any sadness either. He is fairly liberal, but I think he regarded Lennon as a radical. Not really a Beatles fan.

I didn't fully comprehend the news till I got to school. It was all that anyone was talking about, although, being 16, I can't imagine many of us really had much first hand knowledge of the Beatles. Still, it was a somber day. When I got home, the news was showing the huge crowds crying and singing outside the Dakota. The magnitude of the loss began to come into focus.

The two deaths that have affected me most in the world of music were John Lennon and Kurt Cobain. Cobain died on my 30th birthday. I don't know that I have ever cried about either death, but both left me feeling empty, like I'd lost a piece of myself. I don't know if that void ever gets filled again.

I think John's best solo work was his first, Plastic Ono Band. He was going through primal scream therapy at the time, and the wounds of his life were laid bare. These are songs that I have cried over, "God," and "Mother," and here, "Working Class Hero."